Thursday…December 24th…..

“The Christmas Rush” 2009

“If you look deeply into the palm of your hand, you will see your parents and all generations of your ancestors. All of them are alive in this moment. Each is present in your body. You are a continuation of each of these people” – anonymous

gray cloud sky…though my heart abounds with the people I know with my same blood…old pictures from a photo album…when he was ten…I was 3…..we grew older at the same time…just different…worlds…like I was jupitor….he was saturn……but we were both planets….alike but so different…..I remeber…a trip to Las Vegas…when he got married…his knew wife….their new everything….she could smell the topless dancers on me…from the bachelor party…our world was a far cry from the sidewalk days…and the tall pines of their world…but they collided that day….a palce to build your own Bloody Mary…..a place to tell all of the truths…the place to spend a few hundred dollars in pennies on a slot machine…hoping to win that shiny new BMW…..yes sirree….”a new car for a penny”  …he barked….he’d sold slaves…before…he sold drugs and guns before…a car for a penny…how easy could that be….

A poke in the eye or a few dozen boxes of those chocolate covered raisin…that was sort of the choices we were given while standing at the border crossing…wearing those gray raincoats….while the girl in the back….we’d just met sang some hymns from The Book of Moroni….. “I thought it was like a Bible” he said…”not a hymnal”….I shook my head in agreement…while the border guard….started asking riddles instead of threatening us with sharpened sticks….and chocolate cover confectionaires…things were so far out of hand…within reach seemed ridiculous…..all  because we wanted to venture across into another country without the proper pink piece of paper that had the word…”YES”…in some unusual font…yet in “bold” on it….so I carried the cross to his crucifixtion…stabbed him a few times in the side…fitted his crown…of thorns…..long before I realized it was Christmas….not Easter…his parents were a little upset…me…I chose a different college on the east coast…but dreamed of the California girls…Swedish massage…and another way of finding myself without a great deal  of looking…so the choices were narrowing down….by the secnd…before long it would be  a pinpoint sort of life…while all the time I was far to used to a more glamorous life with…autographs and phonographs as the element that made raised or lowered y own bar….so one day I was signing…other days I was singing…it was a semantics issues more than a dental hygiene one…but as long as she thought I needed her….for both…I’d….keep the turban tight…and my eyes straight…ahead….

“Eat drink and be Gary”…was what the billboard read…I thought it an error…everybody named Gary who drove by thought it not only funny…but about them….seems anybody named Gary has this whole thing about being the center of attention…sort of like how Martin Short has lost his ability to be funny…he’s a non-comedian these days..sort of a not funny guy…who thinks he’s really funny…poor you Martin…poor poor you….and no more jokes….either…we sat and discussed what we hated over lunch the other day…..it’s nice knowing there are many things people hate…they just want so hard to be PC…when they really want to call you an ethnic slur…or make fun of you because maybe you are little more handicapped than they are….it’s like these people on Facebook with a few thousand friends….did they send each a Christmas card…or call all 1583 for their birthdays…”Yep…I got lots of friends….just look at my face book friends…we’re all getting together at my house for a bbq…this weekend”….nice…I’m friending everyone on small university campuses under 12,000….for the next few months until I can file a civil suit against Facebook about their stupid friends limit of 5000…..c’mon who doesn’t have at least 5000 friends….if you don’t…change your name to Martin Short….take your 8 friends….and go canoeing….or butterfly collecting…..

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3 thoughts on “Thursday…December 24th…..

  1. Have a Merry Christmas, Robert! Or, I should say, “Mele Kalikimaka!”

    Dinner is at 4:30 PM tomorrow-come on by! Or just dessert if you want.

    Hard to be spontaneous on Christmas Day, though, isn’t it? People usually have solidified plans by now.

    It’s hard to leave room in our lives for spontaneity.

    Either way, I hope you have a great day!

    Like

  2. what you mean?? i have 2354 friends and that isnt enough damn it i want more!!!!!!! that photo is so funny i want a copy for my studio…….all those crooked presents in the air……and that spookyfunnyface…that photo made my face smile out loud

    Like

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