403. September 4th…You….where ever you may be….

“Outside of the Other Side” 2010

“Things are always darkest just before they go pitch black.” Kelly Robinson

3 years 5 days ago….the fault line opened…much like an earthquake churning for a half century before…..spilling itself forward until there was nothing left to expel….just a vacant opening….void and empty….I suposse waiting to be refilled….or to merely sit in isolation…gradually erode until the edges became smooth….and the vacant would become a a part of the landscape…. of sorts….to just be….

and here …at this moment…to reflect on each and every day of the last 1100 days….almost seems impossible to fathom….like holding my breath for 8 minutes…..or tightrope walking….blindfolded…..not in the grip of my hand to hold….but a reality….much like the white calloused skin from a burn…..or the flavor a wonderfully ripe piece of fruit….and if I were the aethiest…condemnation would come as quickly as….if….I were the believer…

it’s like making paper airplanes…the ones that really do fly…floating….lifitng on a breeze we can’t even feel let alone see…but there they move in that invisible world….we know nothing about….and can only believe in it….because we can see it….so there in lies a truth in some illusion of observation….that must be if  eyes allow it….yet they still fly far past our reach…higher until the wax that holds the feathers in place….melts…..the decent then becomes a peril not an adventure…..a horror…not a dream that when….eyes open it is home and safe…

“Return Triumphant”…..is what I was once told….although triumph….often is a wasp nest…..held in a bare hand….and what it takes to be triumphant……may require a level of repetitive defeat and loss to realize…..that ascent…..is not a return…..but a departure for a place that has never been known before….and triumph however percieved may be something minute like…sunlight…..or less…of everything else…..or maybe even failure……but it still is triumph…..nevertheless….

“A tragic situation exists precisely when virtue does not triumph but when it is still felt that man is nobler than the forces which destroy him.” – George Orwell

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